Book Review
Non fiction self help book
Rating- 5/5 in the past ad 3/5 in the future!
Of all the self help book or management training or Human Resource training are more or less based on this grand daddy of self help books!
Many of the early morning supposedly pep up messages or forwards which follow the photo of a flower or a baby or forest or some kid climbing the nearest tree and what not can be traced back to the principles highlighted in this book.
No wonder that with over 30 million copies sold, it is one of the highest or best selling books of all time!
I am sure most of the self help gurus especially the current star Mark Manson would have brushed through this book to write his one or give a talk on self help!
Now after that foundation lets come to Whats in the book and later on give a few pointers on what I think of the book! For a proper summary you can follow the Wikipedia page of the book which gives a good summary of the chapter with a neutral view point.
So the book starts with an introduction on how this one will help you with your life and who all can benefit by reading this book. I am not a non fiction reader and since this was audio book, it was much better to digest! The narrator was someone who I am sure is old and wise by voice and his diction was slow, meticulous and soothing! This of course may be my Mark Manson bias since this book was the next thing I heard after completing his two F@cked up (his words not mine!) book!
Then he moves on the things that matter to other people. How your behaviour and interest is all that matters. So the most basic thing you must understand is that if you want a person to like you or be your friend then you must genuinely be interested in him or her. You must place him or her in a pedestal of genuine appreciation and not flattery. Now that’s a thin line to tight walk and in real life may not be easy!
The author mentioned how the most important person for any person is himself or herself! No one is else is more important! That means that if you want to be in his or her good books then he or she must think in his or her perspective all the time!
Some important methodology highlighted are things like how those fast food joint employees do! Smile! All the time! He also gives examples of many people on each and every methodology he enumerates. How a husband who was a grouch at first just started smiling at first at his wife and everyone else and it did wonders to him!
Then the other point is to be a listener! Sometimes all people want is someone to listen to and that’s all! Even if you just listen with interest and show a genuine smile then you will be called a great person to be with and a great conversationalist even if you did not speak a word!
A great thing he said in the book is that you do not have to win a debate! Even if you are right even then you must give the chance for the person who is wrong to save face and make amends! That’s a rare good advice!
One of the most important thing for any person is his or her name! So if you make an effort to learn the name properly then you may achieve great strides in the relationship arena!
One more thing I found nice in the book is to get answers in positive early on so that the final response is positive! Criticise only indirectly and praise more openly, be more receptive of other people thought and desire! Of course knowledge about that person whom you are going to meet is always helpful especially things which are close and important to him or her!
Basically be polite, don’t crib, smile all the time, be empathic to others feelings, do not point mistakes too much and try to be happy!
Of course all these are important and in real very essential but believe me I know many would have tried all these! People nowadays have become Pre trained in all these management and sales techniques. Being truthful most of the times results in problems which could have been avoided by a white lie and flattery gets you places in this world! Then again there are exceptions and you cannot have one rule for all!
Like every finger of our hand is different so are human beings! Emotional state of mind is like a flowing water which changes at every turn and when it hits a rock! So all we can do is that use our intelligence and emotional quotient in different proportions and act appropriately!
This book is the baseline reference which you can read when you are down to pep you up and face the world!
All the best then!
ramadocblog 