So there are only two people who actually can move through Bangalore traffic…. The first are the ones who are horny (wait for it… Don’t get any ideas in traffic!!) And the second group are the two wheelers!!…
Coming to the horny ones!!….. No; being struck in traffic is not romantic and certainly not horny!!…. The name in Bangalore actually refers to subsets of drivers who drive and speak with their horns!!… They say hi to you, maybe even scold you and certainly curse you by blowing their err horn!!…. The horns are so effective that they do not need to brake!!…it usually starts when the traffic signal is touching orange and stays till it becomes red again!!!…. There are many drivers who don’t or rather can’t drive a vehicle if the horn doesn’t work!… In fact I know of a taxi driver who didn’t report to work cause his horn wasn’t working!!… This when he did report to work when even his brakes were loose!!….
The most irritating horns of course are of the smaller vehicles and just like the voice of humans (??), The horns of the vehicle also follow a hierarchy!!….. And yes you guessed it right, the horn of a big bus would be full of bass treble and loud!!….. And when you hear that occasionally then you better move and give way to the boss (I mean bus!!…)
Now coming to the other group who can escape traffic to a certain extent… The two wheelers…. These are a special group of drivers who don’t stop!…. In fact the definition of a big traffic jam is when a two wheeler stops!… When at least one of the leg touches the ground then theres little hope around!!!…. In an emergency you can trust only your old bike (that’s a very broad term) and nothing else…. In fact there was a thought even by the state in these lines when they introduced the motorcycle ambulance!…. Don’t ask me what happened to them though!!…..
That brings me to my special situation!…. Why I still use my two wheeler?….. simply because it saves a lotta time….. I don’t have to worry about banging and running big costs and it’s low maintenance…… My Ortho pal abhi though always warns me of the perils of two wheeler accident but it literally falls on my deaf ears!!…..
But giving a little thought I have settled for a stable bike with huge center of gravity (read fat!!)… One which looks good (pricy!!) And is low maintenance (not bullet!!) And still can be used without worrying much about wear and tear (it’s not a Harley!!)…. So introducing the new Avenger in town!!…… don’t want to bite the dust though!!….
ramadocblog 